On the bedside table June 23 to 30

ugh! Not much reading done this week as the family (except for Aaron) has been down with gasteroentinitis, which is Latin for "Sucks to be you".  I only finished one book.

Peter and the Shadow Thieves (Barry/Pearson) -- The next book in the prequels to Peter Pan, I didn't enjoy this one as much as the first, but that might be because I was reading it between vomiting spells.  In this book Peter returns to London to warn Molly (from the first book) that she's in danger.  He briefly meets J M Barrie, author of the original Peter Pan, and we are introduced to George Darling. My take-away: Don't read while you're sick, just rest. Or your dreams get weird.

On the bedside table* June 14 to 22

Although I call this blog "wilditude", the sharp-eyed may not that the website is "bookgeekbabe.blogspot.com".  That's because I am a huge book geek. (And a moderate babe).  I LOOOOOOOOOVVVVVEEEE  books.  So much.  Reading is my number one form of entertainment and stress relief.  I don't drink, take drugs, watch much TV, or exercise and I'm trying not to over-eat (HA!) so my first and last line of stress relief is reading. 

Many years back, my work sent me on a speed reading course.  I'd asked for a course on team leading but apparently speed reading is close enough - maybe because they kind of rhyme?  In any case, before I took this course I was a fast reader at 700 words a minute.  Now, depending on the type of book, I can get up to 2,000 words a minute, although reading too long at that speed makes me kind of dizzy. I still have 93% comprehension and 85% retention at that speed.  This is pretty much my sole claim to fame. 

I've often thought I should keep a book journal where I can record the books I read and what I thought of them. I usually read several books a week and, since I read so much, I sometimes find once I start a book that I've already it.  Disappointing!  Anyway, I've tried keeping a journal in various notebooks but I tend to get one or two entries in and then misplace the notebook, or forget, or let the kids draw in it, or spill tea on it . . . .

Last night it occurred to me -- I could keep a list on this blog!  Sometimes I amaze myself.  So here are the books I have read in the last week:

*"Bedside table" also means floor beside the bed, back of the toilet, passenger seat of the car . . .

Brain Rules (John Medina) -- Interesting book on how the brain works.  I enjoy books like this although what they mostly say is "We have no idea why the brain works the way it does."  Which this one mostly said.  What I liked about it was that the author set out 12 "brain rules", devoting a chapter to each one, and at then end of each chapter summarized the content and made recommendation on how to change school/work life to optimize our brain power.  My take-away: Chapter 1 was about how our brains evolved to work best while our body was in motion, so maybe I should reconsider exercising.  May also explain why exercise is so helpful for people with anxiety, depression and ADHD.

Guitar Zero (Gary Marcus) -- Another brain book, although I didn't realize it at the time.  I had ordered a bunch of books on guitar playing from the library for Aaron and this was among them.  The author was approaching his 40th birthday with a burning desire to learn to play guitar and absolutely no musical skill, in fact he is congentially arrhythmic. He is also a brain researching guy (I can't remember his actual title and I've taken the book back to the library), so he decided to take a brain researching approach to learning to play.  It was interesting to see the impact music has on the brain, and how difficult it is to explain!  My take-away: I'm not going to learn music because holy cow! it seems hard.  And I have a much greater appreciation for my guitar-playing man.

Tanglewreck (Jeanette Winterson) -- A  YA fantasy novel set in 2009 London that involves time tornados, worm holes, time travel and parallel universes.  I thought the book was kind of interesting, although the protagonist, Silver, is an 11 year old girl and I had a hard time following the time manipulation plot so I suspect most children would have a hard time too.  My take-away: In the "holding area" (300 years away and in another galaxy) there is a cat named Dinger, as in Schrodinger, who is sometimes dead and sometimes alive. This is cool.

Peter and the Starcatchers -- Dave Barry and Ridley Scott wrote the "prequel" to Peter Pan and, while I love both of their work individually, I was prepared to be disappointed as prequels tend to have an afterthought feel to them, or you can see so clearly where they are going that it's barely worth reading.  This one was great! The story was awesome stand-alone but also nicely tied in the Peter Pan story details we are familiar with. Excellent characters, good action and lots of humour.  My take-away: I totally wish I'd though of the name "Black Stache" for a pirate name.

The Woman Who Changed Her Brain (Barbara Arrowsmith-Young) -- Another brain book -- what was with me this week?  I should be super smart about the brain now.  This was an interesting book about Barbara who was severely learning disabled throughout her school years yet managed to achieve a graduate degree through sheer determination and mind-numbingly hard work. As an adult she heard of some research in which researchers where able to change the make-up of rats brains through training.  Using herself as a guinea pig, she developed training exercises to learn to tell time on a clock, something she had never been able to do.  She found that not only was she able to (with a LOT of hard work) learn to tell time but doing this also helped with other seemingly unrelated difficulties with symbolism, speech etc.  She eventually opened several Arrowsmith schools where people of all ages can learn to overcome their cognitive difficulties. The book highlights the journeys of several students and draws a good picture of the shadow LD can cast over an entire life, and how it can change when the LD is addressed.  My take-away:  Two really.  1-- Sam has poor handwriting and maybe some of the tracing excercises they have their students do would be helpful.   2.  I wish I had the money to send Nathan to this school because I think he would benefit the most.

Wallowing in the Rain

This picture doesn't have much to do with my subject, except that ducks like rain.

It never rains but it pours.  The mysterious "they" say that and I have to agree.  Things have been rough around here.  Money's tight, kids are difficult, and I've run out of the energy and gumption to keep it all going.  It feels like it's one step forward, five steps back.

I topped it off by getting into a car accident.  A minor one, no one hurt. A fender bender, however the other fender is apparently going to cost $1,200 (accident was my fault). And I have a grand total of $3 in the bank right now. It's enough to send me to my bed for a week except, of course, that's not an option for me.  I have to pull up my boots and keep on going.

Everyone is saying it will get better. Money will get better, kids will get better.  Maybe but right now I don't want to hear it will get better, because I know it may not. It hasn't for a while now.  Right now I want to wallow in my misery.  I want to cry and moan and picture life living on the street as we get kicked out of our home because we have no money and the kids are so bad.  I want to consider whether life as a crack whore would be better than this (I get overly dramatic when I'm in this mood).

This is what I don't want to hear:

Everything will get better.
Stiff upper lip!
Every cloud has a silver lining.
It could be worse (especially if this is followed by a story of someone who has it worse than me).

When I'm in pain, I want to be allowed to feel my pain, not be told to suck it up or get over it, which is what those responses, however nicely phrased, are saying.

This is what I do want to hear:

This is hard.
This sucks.
Life isn't fair.
You don't deserve this.
I love you.

So, if you're going through hard times, take a bit of time to wallow if you need to.  Because life is hard, this isn't fair, and you (probably) don't deserve this. And I love you.

*Note: this was better the first time I wrote it. Then my computer froze when I went to add the picture and it was lost, because THAT'S THE WAY MY LIFE HAS BEEN GOING. So, always hit the save button.

When I die it will probably be because someone who said they loved me didn't step up to the plate .. .

Me:  If someone kidnapped me, what would you do to get me back?

Aaron: Whatever they want me to do.  You know, within reason.

Me:  What do you mean "within reason"?  What would be unreasonable to save the life of the woman you love, who also happens to be the mother of your child?

Aaron:  I don't know but there's probably something that would cross the line.

Me: Would you have sex with 6 men?

Aaron:  What?

Me: Would you have sex with 6 men to save my life?

Aaron: Why would 6 men kidnap you to force me to have sex with them?

Me: I don't know, kidnappers are a mysterious, twisted bunch.  Would you do it?

Aaron:  Am I pitcher or catcher?

Me: Both. 3 pitching and 3 catching.

Aaron: Depends.  Would Carson ever find out?

Me: He might, if the kidnappers taped it and put it on the internet and some day in the future he's looking at gay porn sites and comes across it.

Aaron: No, I meant would he ever find out I let you die?

Pitiful.  For the record, I would have sex with 6 men to save his life.  BECAUSE I'M THAT SELF-SACRIFICING. But only if they were going to kill him, because I'm also faithful. Except in life or death situation.

i can assure you, i was totally freaked out

I've had a few rough days but I found this video and it makes everything better.  Just to note, I don't speak French but there are subtitles (although some stupid ad covers part of them and you have to click the x to get rid of it). 

I watch this and laugh and laugh and feel better.  Then I think about how I'm laughing at baby ducks being blown around and feel bad because I'm obviously a terrible person.  So I have to watch it again so I feel better.

Magic Poufing Powder

So, my friend Cindy (who requested a shout out on this) gave me the heads up about this amazing new hair product, volumizing powder.  She and I both have fine, limp hair (although mine is finer and limper) and she said this product gave her instant huge hair.

Well, I ran right down to the drug store and not only found the magic poufing powder but it was on sale!  What is this miracle product?  Got2B's  POWDER'ful Volumizing Styling Powder.

Now, normally my hair is so smooth and shiny that nothing can make it hold volume - not product, not curlers, NOTHING.  so I go about with it flat and limp.  One little shake of this stuff and Houston, we have volume. 

We decided to test the product.  Here is me with air-dried, product-free hair (how I look every day).

Also, no make-up. And kind of a double chin.  The powder did not effect that.

I put a small amount in my hand and rubbed it in good -- like I was scratching for lice. We call it "nitting it up".

It has not smell and feels a little sticky.  Like you could rub it on your hands to give extra grip if you were lifting something heavy and didn't want your hands to slip.  I lifted up the sections of my hair where I wanted lift and rubbed it in.

And here's what it looks like after that.  Be warned -- this is without any further styling, just rubbing in the powder and lightly finger combing my hair.  Also, still no make-up.

This isn't the best picture but trust me, I had at least double the volume.  And it lasted all day.  If it started to droop I would just nit it up again and it was back to poufyness.

The next day I blow dried (with volumizing spray), used the powder, and curled and here is the result:

Uh, it's kind of messy but it still has lots of pouf even after being out in damp weather.  And my double chin disappeared.  Magic!

Now, I know you're thinking "hmm, Kate seems to decorate her home with cubicle walls".  Alas, this is not true.  This test was done at work because several of the ladies I work with were interested in the results.  They were so impressed that they all ran downstairs to the drug store and bought some.  Bonus: it was on sale for 5 bucks.

My review: This is an effective product.  The volume it gave me lasted pretty much all day and the ladies who had less tempermental hair had even better results.  The bottle is small (about the size of a spice jar) but you only need a tiny bit.  Even if you don't use it every day, you could keep it in your purse and if you are out and your hair needs a boost, use it for instant pouf. 

I give it 4 out of 5 high heels.

ADHD Awareness Week

Happy ADHD Awareness Week!  We will be celebrating by . . . trying to remember what we are celebrating.  In our family we have great PLANS to celebrate things but we often get lost in the details.  Executive functions aren't a strong point.

I often have people ask me if I really believe ADHD exists or if it's just an excuse for lazy parents/out of control kids.  Anyone who spends time with someone with ADHD can attest that it does exist.  I struggle daily to keep on task, keep focused, remember what I need to do and not be distracted.  It's frustrating and sometimes heartbreaking to see how easy other people manage to do something as simple as make a meal.  For me it likely means some ingredient will be left out, or something will be burned, or the side dish will be served with the dessert because I forgot to put it on in time to eat with the main course.  It means that the dishes don't get entirely washed because when I went to the living room to pick up empty glasses I noticed the jacket that should go on the hooks, where I found a box that needed to go in the sun porch, where I found the laundry hamper that belonged in the bathroom .  . .

It means that I'm continually explaining to people that my kids aren't being mean when they get rough, or rude, or impulsive.  It means explaining to teachers that Sam CAN'T remember to bring his homework home without a reminder and this will not stop once he's "got into a routine" around Christmas.  It means explaining to teachers that Liam NEEDS to fidget in class and sometimes leave the room because the urge to fidget is almost painful.

It also means that we have a house of fun-loving, up-for-anything people with lots of energy, creativity and optimism.  I often emphasize to my children that ADHD isn't a disease, just a different way of interacting with the world that has some good points and some bad points.  We deal with them as best we can and try to laugh over the mistakes and problems we have as well as celebrate when things are going well.

If you want more information on ADHD Awareness week or ADHD in general, this website is a good starting place.