Wallowing in the Rain

This picture doesn't have much to do with my subject, except that ducks like rain.

It never rains but it pours.  The mysterious "they" say that and I have to agree.  Things have been rough around here.  Money's tight, kids are difficult, and I've run out of the energy and gumption to keep it all going.  It feels like it's one step forward, five steps back.

I topped it off by getting into a car accident.  A minor one, no one hurt. A fender bender, however the other fender is apparently going to cost $1,200 (accident was my fault). And I have a grand total of $3 in the bank right now. It's enough to send me to my bed for a week except, of course, that's not an option for me.  I have to pull up my boots and keep on going.

Everyone is saying it will get better. Money will get better, kids will get better.  Maybe but right now I don't want to hear it will get better, because I know it may not. It hasn't for a while now.  Right now I want to wallow in my misery.  I want to cry and moan and picture life living on the street as we get kicked out of our home because we have no money and the kids are so bad.  I want to consider whether life as a crack whore would be better than this (I get overly dramatic when I'm in this mood).

This is what I don't want to hear:

Everything will get better.
Stiff upper lip!
Every cloud has a silver lining.
It could be worse (especially if this is followed by a story of someone who has it worse than me).

When I'm in pain, I want to be allowed to feel my pain, not be told to suck it up or get over it, which is what those responses, however nicely phrased, are saying.

This is what I do want to hear:

This is hard.
This sucks.
Life isn't fair.
You don't deserve this.
I love you.

So, if you're going through hard times, take a bit of time to wallow if you need to.  Because life is hard, this isn't fair, and you (probably) don't deserve this. And I love you.

*Note: this was better the first time I wrote it. Then my computer froze when I went to add the picture and it was lost, because THAT'S THE WAY MY LIFE HAS BEEN GOING. So, always hit the save button.